dreamweaver says.

Friday, September 02, 2005 ; 2:56 PM

Ok. I'm not in a great blogging mood now. But I blardy well need to complain about this shitty person. This two headed snakey idiot! Argh!! I'm not usually this agitated at anybody but this one. This one wins the title. I'm just this close to start hurling vulgarities.

This started back then when V and me totally gave it E, telling her how we felt about how L is towards E. Constantly hanging around her as if she doesn't already have a close clique and keeping her away from us when it was obvious that she is really not needed around. Then, L for a period of time, stopped being a nuisance.

Thinking back now, I realized alot of what she did. As in, it dawned onto me the motives behind her actions. Her cake, her enthusiam and all. Was all a sham. All she was trying to do was to suck up to her. This I realized when E wasn't around and because I wasn't going to attend Physics remedial most of the time, I thought I could ask somebody to help collect and take down notes for E for a month. I asked L. I'm pretty sure I wasn't being overly sensitive but she seemed to avoid answering my request. She asked me back, why don't I want to take down the notes instead. I explained to her. She was hesitant, as in she did not know how to decline. Lessons started and I had to stop talking to her, making a mental note to approach other people for help instead. I've seen it through. How could a person who was so enthusiastic for E less than a week ago be so reluctant to help her now? This shows that it was all in an attempt to suck up to her and is not willing to make any real sacrifices for a friend. It is no wonder that she had no close friends in class.

That week when E was about to come back, L suddenly became really friendly towards me, wanting to study with me and all. I thought she genuinely wanted to be friends. I agreed to study with her. It was alright, I guess. Since we aren't actually close friends and all. You can say I'm slow and all because once again, I only reflected the truth behind it all a week later.

That morning when E was supposed to come back to school, she smsed me in the morning to meet her in the canteen. I went there and but she wasn't there yet. I came back from the toilet and found E and L sitting at the table. It was no surprise that they came to school together because they lived so near each other. Then I placed my bag next to the bench where E was sitting at the round table and went to buy food. When I came back, L was sitting at the same bench where my bag was at, leaving me with no space to sit with MY bag while the rest of the benches are DIRTY. So I sat alone, ate alone, looking absolutely like an idiot while E and L rattled away. I made it obvious to E about my unhappiness and I knew she could tell too. During the next period, she tried to talk to me because I had kept quiet the whole time when L was around. That was the first incident ever since E came back.

Second.. It was today. We had our English prelims. After that, E and me were walking towards the foyer and talking. Suddenly L popped out from nowhere. It was told to me later that L was frantically asking around for E. So anyway, L was asking where E was going now, while as usual, totally ignoring my existence, which I assume is because she was feeling guilty that she had been using me before and did not dare to talk to me after I've wised up. E was telling L that she's meeting her mum for lunch and L was like saying,"I very hungry leh.. There's nobody to eat with me." A very lame attempt at being nonchalent and indirect. Coz it was told to me again that L knew E was going to eat at CP and she wanted to eat with her too. -_-" E was trying to be nice and all and told her that she can walk by PP with her though, after me and her go to the toilet. L said she'll wait at the foyer. I came out of the toilet and thought E haven't come out yet. So I waited and realized that she had gone. So I went off and saw E and L was just walking out of the gate. I quickened my pace to catch up with them, feeling very angry by now. Why hadn't E even asked me to walk out with them too? I was walking behind them and when E saw me, I made it obvious that I was angry with her and walked off.

That was it. I don't wanna be a thick skinned freak just like how L had been by cutting into where she wasn't wanted. And I believe that she took advantage of that and hung around her like nobody's business, knowing that I will not be there to disturb her. Fine, *****. Do all you want. And even if E decides to be good friends with her, she'll soon realize what a 'nice' person she is. And I don't wanna add that she's a biggest hypocrite I've ever met in my life too. It amazes me so much to come across a person like that now. I had always thought such people exists in the dog-eat-dog corporate world out there. I guess I was wrong. How very wrong.

And thanks to V for standing by me and the person behind all the "it was told to me..." :P